Attributes, Attitudes, & Actions!

Let's talk about some green flags! Finding a partner you want to spend your life with can be a daunting idea. There are many small things to pay attention to while dating that can signal how a marriage with that person would go. That said, I want to emphasize the importance of getting to know your partner in their worst as well as their best moments before making the commitment of marriage. The rule of three is a great outline for determining when to or not to progress a relationship. After every three months of dating, it can be very beneficial to communicate how both are feeling about where the relationship is headed. People tend to change after about three and six months. Guards will go down and one's true character tends to show more clearly after this amount of time. If someone is putting on a front, their "act" will likely drop after around three months. Thus, it is important that you get to experience being with your partner through all seasons! 

What are some green flags to look for?

- someone who reciprocates affection

- someone who pays attention to your needs as well as conveys their own

- someone who is kind to strangers as well as friends and family members

- someone who talks respectfully about others

- someone who can identify and express their emotions

- someone who is willing to put forth effort

- someone who is open to hearing other perspectives

- someone who practices active listening

- someone who respects boundaries

- someone who tries to sympathize even if they may not understand something you are experiencing

- someone who exhibits genuine interest in things you care about

- someone who is passionate about their goals

- someone who is more positive than negative

It is important to note that possessing these attributes will attract someone who also possesses these attributes and abilities. The attitudes and actions exhibited while dating are good indicators of how one will act in a marriage. What does a healthy relationship look like?

Healthy relationships involve:

• communication

• sufficient alone time

• mutual effort

• active listening

• willingness to forgive

• compromise

• holding each other accountable

• common values

• accepting and sharing responsibility

Healthy relationships, in dating as well as marriage, progress between individuals who are healthy themselves. The foundation for healthy relationships is fortified through self-awareness, self-improvement, and secure friendship.